A Not Really Imaginary Conversation Between Myself And Jesus

Hey, Lord.

Hey, yourself.  Do you always address the Almighty like that?

Sorry.  Just kind of tired and bummed out tonight.

You know, it’s not all that important that Jeff Gordon crashed tonight.

The race is the least of my worries.

I hope so.  What’s dragging on you?  As if I don’t know.  But I want you to get it off your chest.

The usual.  Mostly this blasted depression.

Consider it your thorn in the flesh so you’ll remember to rely on Me and Me alone.

I know, Lord.  With my penchant for ego trips I need something to remind me who and what I am.  Still, it sucks how it drains me of the ability to write.  Or do much of anything else.

I know.  One day you’ll understand.  I promise.

Thanks.  Speaking of writing, mind if I bring up “that” topic again?

No.  I’m aware how it eats at you.

Is it right for me to feel that way about it?

Why don’t you spell it out.  It’ll help you to see.

Thanks.  It… well, it really wears me down, Lord.  I believe I’m putting good stuff out there.  But hardly anyone reads it.

The people that do read it are getting something from it.

I know, Lord.  Believe me, I’m grateful for that.  But still… I guess what it is — no, I know what it is.  It’s that every time I try to get the attention of the big boys and girls they ignore me.  Completely ignore me.

They’re often quite busy.

Too busy to ever answer an e-mail?  Or add a link to GAC?  There’s busy and then there’s plain rudeness.  To be frank about it…

I expect nothing less from you.

I know, Lord.  Anyway, frankly it’s inexcusable.  I hope it isn’t ego talking when I say I’ve got something worthwhile to share.  Something the people with the big audience ought to at least acknowledge exists.  And mention to their readers.  It’s not like they’re going to lose any readers by doing so.

I know.

I mean, the way they suck up to each other.  And the things they promote.  You have Christians singing the praises of Allahpundit.  You have Christians linking to Little Green Footballs.  Come on.  I mean, come on.  These people hate You even as they don’t believe You exist, Lord.  They sneer at those who don’t see things their way.  What kind of logic is this?  “Hey, everyone — this guy thinks I’m a moron for being a believer!  But he’s a conservative, so isn’t he great?”  It’s insane.

You know one of the main reasons they ignore you is because you keep saying things like that out loud, I hope.

I know.  No one likes the boy at the end of the parade of the emperor’s new clothes who says he doesn’t see anything.  But what else am I supposed to do?  Suppress the truth and play the suck-up game?

I’d prefer you not do that.

So what are my options, Lord?  Continue to be ignored?

Jerry.

Continue to struggle to put two words together praying someone somewhere will somehow find them?

Jerry.

Be satisfied with whatever crumbs might be thrown my way?  Because…

Jerry.

Yes, Lord?

What did I say about people who pray in public?  Or announce when they give a charitable gift?  Or let everyone know they’re fasting?

“I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full.”

Yes.  And what did I say about those who call Me “Lord, Lord?”

“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only he who does the will of my Father who is in heaven.  Many will say to me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and in your name drive out demons and perform many miracles?’  Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you.  Away from me, you evildoers!’”

Correct.  I alone know what is in the heart of a man.  I know those who love Me, and those who use a pretense of loving Me for personal gain.  I know who follows Me, and who pays Me great lip service while their hearts are far from Me, focused on themselves alone.  I alone know these things.  Do not concern yourself with them.

This, though, you can and should concern yourself with.  Telling the truth is not judgment.  You know these people.  You see their works.  Do they bear fruit?  Do they minister to those who need to hear?  Or do they speak only to themselves and to those who nod their heads in agreement, never once reaching out beyond their own kind?

It does seem like a rather insular circle, doesn’t it.

You are riddled with failings and failures.  Yet you have spoken of Me to those that will never be spoken to by the proud and self-satisfied who claim allegiance to Me.  You, in all your sin, have extended the hand of kindness and charity to those who are scorned and hated.  You did so because I asked you to.  You were presented with the opportunity to do so, and you did.  Not every time.  Never perfectly.  But you did do these things.

You are no better than anyone else.  Nor are you any worse than anyone else.  If I willed it for you to speak to multitudes, it would be so.  Perhaps one day you will.  That is for Me alone to know.  What you are to know is that My will is for you to say what I move your heart and mind to say.  It will reach those it is meant to reach.  It is My will for you to let people know I love them.  Just as, once, someone let you know I love you.  And Jerry?

Yes, Lord?

I do love you.  It is My will for you to love even as you are loved.  Sometimes that love is expressed in words of correction.  But don’t let that concern you.  That’s My concern.  You?  You just love even as you are loved.  No matter what.  And remember that no matter what… you are loved.